MEG TOYS - CANDIES WE MEGSTERS HATE:

  1. Neeco Candy Hearts - Are these industrial waste or something? I mean, what is that flavor exactly? And none of the colors taste any different. And do you really want come on candy that says "Fax Me" and "You Rule"? Where's the one that says "Help, call a doctor!" I don't care if they are fat free. No thanks!!

  2. Neeco Candy Necklaces - Yup, you guessed it....candy hearts on an elastic string (see #1), that you suck off of your neck. Uh, huh. Great if you have a dying wish to be attacked by bees.

  3. Peeps Marshmallow Chickens, Bunnies, Birds, Snowmen, Santas, Disgruntled Postal Workers, etc. - I don't care what shape it is or what funky color they use, ick. I especially refuse to even believe they are marshmallows. I know this for a fact because my dog who think mallows rule and goes ape ___ for toasted marshmallows will NOT even eat a Peeps chicken. And think about it, there are only 2 foods my dog won't eat, Peeps, & Ms. Paul's fish. But, that's for another web page.

  4. Marshmallow Fruit Flavored Easter Eggs - You know, those larger individually wrapped eggs that you hunt for that are brightly colored? What the heck is in those bitter things? Second thought, don't tell us. And does anyone eat them?? What a waste. Hunt for toys.

  5. Circus Peanuts - Icky sweet fluffy weird peanut-shaped things. And every parent forces them on you at every birthday party don't they? I'll be honest, one is tolerable if your in the mood for nostalgia, after that, they're annoying. Oh, yeah, my dog coughed those up on the rug too.

  6. Blue Mist?? Hard Candy - Anyone remember that nameless blue hard candy that tastes like a bad menthol coughdrop. Heck, I'd rather have a Hall Mentholyptus. And they come by the thousands in that huge 25 lb. Trick or Treat mix bag. Who even makes those? Hey, I guess they thought it might be best to remain anonymous, wouldn't want that on my resume. Yeah, give those to kids. Sure if you want them to side your house with them. I'd like a blue house for a change. Why not?

  7. Cinnamon Red Hot Hearts - The strong cinnamon flavor is ok....for about 4. Then you have the remaining 3 lb bag that melts together in a sticky blob in your cabinet. Ever hear of SNACK SIZE BAGS???

  8. Cinnamon Hard Candy - That other trick or treat candy from hell, nameless, and always in the big Trick or Treat mix bag. Not much better than the Blue Mist hard candy. Too strong a cinnamon flavor. Can anyone eat a whole piece before have to spit it out? First half is fine, then it gets gross.

  9. Rootbeer Lifesavers & Rootbeer Barrels - Yup, another treaters nightmare, root beer is bad enough with fizz, but, the taste of flat root beer sucks. Hey, here's an even better idea, try creme soda hard candy. That should make you lose your lunch even quicker.

  10. Dum Dum Pops - The remaining candy in the 25 lb Halloween mix. These are not great, the wrappers are always the wrong flavor, and they come off the stick after 3 seconds. So, you can't even give them to kids. So, WHY do they come in pallet-sized bags? Please tell me why????? Does anyone have a use for 3,007 mini lollypops??

  11. Halloween & Christmas Oreos - Now, I LOVE oreos. We all do. Admit it. BUT, that dye in the holiday colored cremes is the most bitter crap I've ever tasted. What's up with that? Is it elf-sabotage. Do the execs at Nabisco not taste these things? All I can say is thank God they don't come in a Double Stuff variety. P.S. Milk doesn't help.

  12. Ju Ju Fruits - Ever wonder why you're only allowed to eat these in a dark theather??? Well, I guess once your teeth glue together you won't talk and spoil the plot for other movie patrons.

  13. Good n' Plenty - Look, licorice is great, if you want it, eat it. But, don't put sweet, fruit-flavored sugarballs on the outside. It ruins it.

  14. Werther's Chocolate Covered Reisen? - The only chocolate caramel that could be used to tile the space shuttles. Shouldn't jurrasic candy have some kind of expiration date? These things are like rocks!!! Bet Dentists love them, bet a disgruntled dentist invented them.

  15. Sugar-free Hard Candy - The coffee tastes like cherry, the cherry tastes like mint, and who the hell can taste them at all because the glassy things either stick to your teeth or mouth, or you inhale them as they slip down your throat.

  16. Fruit Punch Powder Straws - Do you snort this stuff or what? What boolean logic figured the mechanics of this out? WEIRD!!!

  17. Atomic Fireballs - Who makes these things.....people on the sun??? It's like tabasco candy. You could drop them down the drain to melt grease. And then after you brave the inside, there's that wimpy sweet center that won't disolve and if you aren't careful you'll chomp on and break a tooth!! (M.E.G. Customer Submission)

  18. Candy Buttons - Who wants to eat candy with paper glued to it? (M.E.G. Customer Submission)

  19. Black Jacks, Squirrel Nut Chews & Mary Janes-Great if you're looking to crack your teeth. Oh yeah, and don't suck them down your throat unless your dating Mr. Heimlich Manuever? Not to mention that if you are successful eating one it turns on your and becomes a clay-like glob. (M.E.G. Customer Submission)

  20. Brach's Maple Nut Goodies (Maple-flavored Toffee Chews) If I wanted to have the taste of maple in my mouth, I'd eat a spoonful of pancake syrup! (M.E.G. Customer Submission)

  21. Pez Candy Sure, they're a 20th century collectible & cultural icon, but only for the containers--does anyone really like the candy itself? (M.E.G. Customer Submission)

  22. STORE BRAND Butterscotch Candy - It has no flavor and is hard as a rock. Suzanne Sommers could do an ad for that as a tongue-ercisor. All you do is burn calories trying to get rid of the darn things!!! Do they varnish that stuff??

  23. Gel Candy - I'll take "Candies that ooze for $200 Alex" - I'm not eating slime, don't care how much sugar you lace it with. Oh, yeah, and make it lock-jaw sour apple laced with a pound of sugar. I like to be rushed to the emergency room.


But, the real mystery is WHY do these candies persist generation after generation?? I mean some sucky candy has gone to the great calorie graveyard, you don't see Fruit Flavored 3 Musketeer Bars anymore do you? (And I won't go into them here, just repeat the name and THINK about it!)

FINALLY, three GREAT BIG MEG cheers for:

HERSHEY'S & M&M/MARS

  • Hey, after reading, feel free to add your own to our list. Got a candy YOU hate, send it in and a humorous blurb on why and we'll be glad to post it here and give you the credit (if you like). You can remain anonymous too if you prefer. Send us your suggestions!

    DISCLAIMER: Opinions expressed above are of the authors only (and secretly everyone else) and are not the opinions of any other corporate entity. Even if Hershy's does know that chocolate rules over Candy Hearts they or no other company has any affiliation with or endorsement of this page. Furthermore, we are not a company and stand no gain from this page either. It is for entertainment/information/vanity only. Unless you hershey execs WANT to give me a million bucks???
    Web page: http://www.megstoybox.com
    E-mail: staff@megstoybox.com
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